All I really needed to know I learned from my Dad

I have learned many things from my dad. The most valuable of these lessons are not to judge others, to forgive, and that everyone deserves a second chance. I didn’t learn these things through hours of lectures, but through hours, years even, of watching him. I recently was reminded of how my dad embodies all these characteristics and how they personally affected one person.

While sitting at a Halloween church party, a member from our Ward came up and asked Scott if he was okay with the fact that he vacationed with me in Hawaii over 30 years ago. Both Scott and I looked back at him in confusion.

This man told us that a few weeks earlier he was sitting in Sunday school when he noticed a visitor. He saw a man that looked familiar, but he couldn’t quite place where he knew him from or remember his name. Just then the visitor stood and introduced himself as JR Stewart. He was in town watching his grandkids while we where in Italy. Then it all came back to him. JR Stewart was his boss at Stewarts many years ago in Salt Lake City.

Our friend from church said that he worked for my dad when he was a young teenager. He admitted that he was immature and made some stupid decisions – some of these bad decisions not only hurt himself, but my dad’s business, as well as his standing there as an employee. Without going into any details, he let me know that he had done some things at work that were not honest. Not only should he have lost his job, but other authorities should have been involved.

Our friend went on to tell us that he was not fired, nor turned in to the police. Instead, my dad kept him on at the store and let him work to pay off his damage. He said besides working all summer without pay, he was never treated any differently than before. At the end of the summer, the Coleman Company compensated Stewarts well for a productive year with many free trips to Hawaii. While having to pay for a large portion of his trip, our friend was one of those employees invited to Hawaii. So that explained why we vacationed together many years ago!

Our friend was a little nervous and embarrassed to re-introduce himself to my dad. He was sure he had never forgotten that little punk that caused him so much trouble all those years ago. But he got up the courage to go say hello.

Our friend was relieved when he had to explain to my dad who he was and when he worked for him. Now you might think this has something to do with the fact that my dad is getting old and losing his memory. While part of that might be true, it has much more to do with the fact that my dad truly understands repentance and forgiveness.

For I will be merciful to their unrighteous, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more. (Hebrews 8:12)

I have never seen my dad judge a person by their race, religion or history. Everyone is equal, everyone is valued, and everyone has potential. He believes in repentance in its truest sense. When someone repents, you forgive….and forget. In my dad’s mind, the events of this foolish young man never happened.

While these events have been long removed from my dad’s mind, they are still a very important part of our friend’s memories. He told us what a turning point that was for him in his life. He decided then and there to be the person that my dad believed him to be. He told us that my dad taught him more about the atonement and the Savior than any other person or experience in his whole life. My dad taught him the joy of repentance and gave him a taste of the unconditional love that our Savior has for us.

Like our friend, I too have been forever changed from watching my dad. No, he’s not perfect, and like all of us he has his faults. But when it comes to what really matters, my dad has it all figured out. Love one another, forgive one another and lift one another. Here is to hoping you still have many years to teach others through your example dad…I love you!